Respect the Swap

We all love craigslist.com.  Even though the couch you see for $300 is really worth only $25 when you go to pick it up, craigslist has it's moments.  Well our moment came when we house swapped with a family in San Clemente for our place on the north shore of Kauai.  It was and is a great switch for many reasons, however one of the best things has been teaching our son Given about respect.

Where we live on Kauai it is lush... when I say lush I mean LUUUUUUSH!!!  Green everywhere, plants growing as if the rain was made of steroids mixed with Miracle Grow.  Our son, since the time he could crawl ALWAYS wanted to pick flowers and leaves around our yard.  Didn't think anything of it until... dun dun dunnnnn... the house swap.... where the families yard is a beautiful garden filled with everything that can grow in Southern California.  Berries, melons, tomatoes, squash, you name they've got it.  Once Given saw the goodies he was after them!! Poor guy has been able to tear apart his yard in Hawaii and basically watch it grow back by the afternoon.   

I have to admit that at first I felt like the no pick it nazi, but once I started thinking I realized that this is respect at 15 months.  He has to learn to "respect" the fruit until it's ready to come off it's branch... and "respect" the fact that you can't just get what you want when you want it (something I still learn daily thanks to my hubby!!).  When he picked the first baby berry I got on his level and said, "Hey Mr that's not very nice to do to the bush or the berry.  It didn't get a chance to grow up.  You have to respect the plant."  He then tested me with the hibiscus bud and I said it again making eye contact.

Now two weeks into the swap, and after three time outs, he waits at the foot of the garden waiting for me to pick the blueberries.  Call me crazy, but I think kids understand when you get on their level and explain things to them.  I read how important it is to talk to them like they're there... and as hard as it at times my husband and I try to do that... and I think it REALLY works!  When friends come over, we try not to say "Given did this or that today."  We try to include him in the story... like"Given I'm going to tell so and so what you did today."  Or "Hey did you tell so and so what happened to you at the beach."  I know it sounds weird, but I swear it works.  Think if you were sitting there and people were talking about you like you weren't there, you wouldn't feel respected right?

And after all the berries were eaten I realized I have to respect this guy if I expect him to respect...

Starting Somewhere

I truly believe that becoming a parent is the most amazing job there is. Nothing takes more work, more dedication and more unconditional love.... but as we child rearing folks also know, nothing satisfies the soul more either!!

I titled this "Starting Somewhere" because that's what we do as parents. Every morning we wake up (most of us unrested from the night before) and we start from this place called "somewhere".... not really knowing where this is we muster up the courage to raise up these little humans into the best people we can imagine.... hoping that "somewhere" pays off and we produce someone that will love the earth and want to do good in life.

The beauty about being a parent is we get to acquire all kinds of wisdom from others and then regurgitate it and turn it into our own parenting style. Our "somewhere" becomes a unique way that does change the world eventually whether we like it or not.

And that's why I started this blog.... because after reading dozens of books, watching my amazing friends raise up their babies and me making mistake after mistake (we're good at that aren't we??), I wanted to share the struggles and accomplishments with all of you.

So I'm thinking everyday I'll let you know what's going on on my home front. I'd love to get comments back too about what YOUR going through!!

My son Given has amazed me over and over again (like I'm SURE your lil angel has to you) and I've seen how little things I've learned along the way can REALLY make a difference.

So let's share and have fun and celebrate the blessing of being a parent!!